Autism Soccer: Living With Autism: A Party Survival Guide

But this doesn't mean you have to stop attending to parties, just figure out what's best for you.

Children’s parties and social gatherings can be a great opportunity for our children to practise and develop their social skills in a supportive environment. But children living with autism spectrum disorder (ASD) can find parties and social gatherings difficult at the very least.

Parties often imply playing games, taking turns, listening to instructions, and by definition being with other people. All of this can be hard for children with ASD, who have some trouble with communication and social interaction. On top of this, many party games and activities require skills that are hard for children with ASD to master, like organising, waiting or infering what comes next.

A particular group children with ASD are easily overwhelmed by their surroundings. They might find it hard to deal with the noise of other children laughing and shouting, the loud music or people singing ‘Happy birthday’ all together. All these stimuli can be from stressing to frightening, and we didn’t even talk about clowns.

But at the end of the day, socialising and going to parties can help children with ASD to practise communication and social skills, that’s why is so important to keep them included and incite them to participate. But the social world can be complicated and confusing for a child with ASD. Planning ahead and helping your child build social skills is the way to go.

ASD Children and Parties: Can they Coexist?

Yes, they can. For a start, there’s no pressure at all to take your child with autism spectrum disorder to a birthday party. Just do what feels more manageable for you as a parent, because if you are comfortable and feel at ease, so will your kid. But if both you and your child want to go, some planning can help you feel more confident and your child feel better prepared for the event ahead.

A Story (remember, visual aids for these kind of lessons) about the party could be a good first step. You could focus the story on something specific like how to take turns, or how to behave when someone else wins a game. You could also ask the party hosts what they’re planning, and use a visual schedule to show your child what’s going to happen when.

Role-plays are another good way to educate your child for a party. For example, you and your child could role-play some of the things that will happen at the party like arriving, saying hello or taking turns with other children.

Video-modelling (again, a useful visual aid) can also work wonders. You can buy ready-made videos to help your child learning social skills, like how to behave properly at a birthday party. Making your own videos is also a great option because it would have the familiar factor.

Planning to go to the party and stay only for the parts your child can manage can be a practical idea. You could also plan for you and your partner, or another trusted adult, to take turns supervising the child. An escape plan, if you will, for if your child feels overwhelmed might help too. For example, plan to take your child out for a strollor to sit in a quiet room.

A sort of emergency kit, packed with your child’s favourite toys, books or snacks might soothe things down if needed.

You can help your ASD child build skills for taking turns, sharing with others, joining in and self-soothing. These skills are useful for parties and other social events, but they’re also very useful in the playground and classroom or when your child is with friends.

For example, you might know that your child gets distressed when he loses a game. So you could work on losing with grace and in calm. You could build up skills in this area by:

Telling a Story that shows that it’s OK to lose sometimes.
Practising losing at games of chance like ‘snap’ or ‘snakes and ladders’, with are nothing but fair and equal to all.
Teaching your child to say, ‘Congratulations, you won’
Using a reward of 10 minutes of a favourite activity of his/hers each time your child uses his script and loses in a calm fashion. You might need to provide the reward at birthday parties to start with.

As you have read, here at Autism Soccer we care about all aspects regarding the life of our Readers. Follow us on our social networks and don’t hesitate to leave your comments in the section below.